As promised, I am sending you here more info and details on how women and men perpetuate really painful relationship dynamics and how to break out of that, once and for all.
We, the human race, are ready for something new. Something drastically new, something that works, something that finally meets our biological need to be and feel deeply connected with one another.
So much work is being done in technology, medicine, education, and agriculture to improve how we as human beings live and evolve.
It is time to change how we do relationships.
We are deeply entrenched in ways of doing life, which do not work. Women tend to criticize men, and men tend to withdraw emotionally from women. And the opposite is true as well, in spades.
It is time to change how we do relationships.
We all have our armor up, to protect ourselves from feeling the unbearable pain of losing love. So, the best remedy is, to not let love happen. To not let loving relationships be our reality, although we constantly claim, silently or out loud, that we want that.
If we don’t have a loving relationship, we can’t lose it and hence it won’t hurt. Unfortunately, as smart as this coping mechanism is that we all share, we are miserable when not in relationship. Because we are biologically wired to be in relationship! We really are.
So, we are most of the time between a rock and a hard place – either pushing love away so we won’t feel the pain of losing it, or we create circumstances so we don’t even have to worry about losing it as we are so far removed from having it.
What would your life look like if you were not afraid of losing love and connection?
If you are telling yourself that you are not afraid of losing love and connection or that you don’t want a relationship, I would like to challenge you and invite you to consider that this may simply be a very well-developed copying strategy to never feel the pain of losing it.
What would it be like if you could soften that fear of losing love? Could you let more love in? Can you be present with your fear of losing love, and just hang out with it, without pushing it away? Can you be kind and loving towards the part of you that is petrified of losing love, and validate it? It may go a long way in terms of taking off the edge.
Resolving traumas that resulted from moments of not feeling loved and cared for as an infant will go an even longer way.